The indispensable ‘ingredient’ required for making a pleasant and delicious ‘dish’ for a harmonious home is ‘love’. Like glue that binds the pages of a book together, love is a mystical balm that has the unique power to permeate, harmonize and sustain all relationships. The expression of just a ‘dose’ of altruistic love to one another can break down differences of mountainous proportion anywhere in human society.
By Dr. Jonathan Isibor
Home Harmony, here, relates to a condition where the mind and emotions of the inhabitants of a house are well balanced; in order words, there is the visible expression of the feeling of pleasure, delight, contentment, understanding and joy among the individuals making up the home.
The term ‘Harmony’ derives from the Greek word – Harmonia – meaning “joint, agreement, concord.” In music, ‘Harmony is what occurs when different musical notes are played or sung simultaneously to produce a pleasing effect.
No wonder music, mostly meditative or classical music, is able to calm the weary nerves or mind of man!
With this preamble, let us now share some thoughts on what home harmony entails. It is common knowledge everywhere that whenever a person behaves in a way that attracts undue attention, people are quick to query; “Where does he come from?”, so the home usually becomes the reference point.
In this article, a home could be regarded as a place where husband and wife live and raise their children and interact with other people.
There is a mystical law embedded in this formation! Now, the man/husband is the first point; the woman/wife, the second point while the child/son or daughter represents the third point.
This formation in the language of symbology represents the triangle. Symbolically therefore, the man, the woman and the child constitute the three points of a triangle.
In metaphysical parlance, the triangle alludes to perfection i.e. perfect creation! So, the corollary here is that a home should be a semblance of perfection.
A home should be an abode where harmony should reign and from there radiate to all segments of human society. Home has been described as the cradle of man.
Just as a sane society depends on a sane home, so it is that a sane and harmonious home should depend on responsible and healthy individuals.
To be a healthy person does not necessarily mean the mere absence of disease, but also entail the presence of wellness in the mental, emotional, economic and spiritual aspects of life.
At the mental level, a healthy individual should have a proper mindset. With a proper mindset, the so called poor man can still be happy.
Conversely, if the mindset is not right, no matter how much material possessions you may have, you may still remain very unhappy.
We must also exercise good control of our emotions. Positive emotions such as love, compassion and joy should be cultivated by individual members of any home, if happiness is their ultimate goal, while negative emotions such as fear, anger and hate need to be eradicated from our thought pattern for these are harmful ingredients of disharmony.
We should realize that our body’s immune system is generally enhanced by positive emotions and mental outlook; conversely, it is depressed by negative mental and emotional states.
Thus, stress, worry, anger and fear are some states that may lead to very unpleasant medical conditions.
Other than the mental and emotional poise required of members of a home, a stress – free financial state is very necessary for a stable family home.
There has to be some measures of financial freedom, the ability to manage one’s resources, freedom from unnecessary wants or desires. All of these can be summed up in one word – Contentment.
Equally necessary, if not superior to other forms of optimum health, is the spiritual health of the family unit. Every member of a home is a dual being, having a physical self as well as a spiritual self.
It is the spiritual self that governs or control all other aspects of our lives and therefore everyone must find a way to fortify his or her spiritual nature.
Imagine yourself living in the same house with persons who are mentally, emotionally, financially and spiritually stable. Yours certainly will be a happy home.
Harmony at home is the bedrock of a stable society. Healthy relationships with others conduce to societal peace.
Knowing this therefore, shouldn’t we spend more time and effort in improving our relationship with others especially our parents, spouses, children and sibling?
The indispensable ‘ingredient’ required for making a pleasant and delicious ‘dish’ for a harmonious home is ‘love’.
Like glue that binds the pages of a book together, love is a mystical balm that has the unique power to permeate, harmonize and sustain all relationships.
The expression of just a ‘dose’ of altruistic love to one another can break down differences of mountainous proportion anywhere in human society.
It has long been recognized that a successful marital union creates an opportunity or a successful home.
Marriage helps to promote growth and provide a home of love and beauty, a sanctuary for study and communion.
According to David Goodman, an American Psychologist, marriage “brings out the highest aspects of human personality and creates an enduring social order which each generation can initiate and then pass on for future generations to live by and enjoy”.
In concluding this article, it is worth mentioning those important factors that could contribute to creating a better home for all persons irrespective of clime, race and status.
Firstly, a home where each spouse sustains or upholds the marital vows is bound to remain a happy home.
Secondly, couples must learn to accommodate themselves, and must never use sexual starvation to settle their displeasure over issues.
Thirdly, it can be an effective tonic for a stable home when couples learn to eat, pray, sleep and even bathe together.
Within a nuclear family, certain objectives which parents must emphasize and labor to achieve when bringing up their children include the need to appreciate the right sense of values, right attitude towards sex and respect for life and property, proper communication skills, and respect for other religions and cultures.
When parents and children play their respective roles in the management of family affairs within the ambit of the laws of the country in which they have the privilege of being residents, theirs certainly will be a harmonious home.
May God grant us the grace and wherewithal to live in harmony with ourselves and our environment so we may become useful citizens of the land.
Dr. Jonathan Isibor is an Associate Professor of Microbiology at Ambrose Alli University, Ekpoma, Edo State of Nigeria. He can be reached at: joe_isibor@yahoo.com
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